11

Expression écrite d'anglais

Bonjour.
Je crois que tu as bien fait pour la compréhensibilité de ton texte.
Par mise en forme, je voulais dire qu'il ne fallait pas commnncer chaque phrase à la ligne.
Parfois la fluidité pourrait bénéficier d'autres LINK WORDS.
Attention à ton utilisation des point virgules (j'ai mis en gras depuis un moment, mais peut-être ça se voit mal.

Bon courage.

12

Expression écrite d'anglais

A d'accord je comprend mieux.

ça va mieux comme ceci?

Merci beaucoup!!

  After the 2004 tidal wave in Asia, many children became orphans.
In such a situation, I think it is better for them to be taken charge of in differents parts of the world.
However, to leave is not the solution for everything.

   Indeed, I think it is better for them to be taken charge of in different parts of the world because it is a “chance” for them.They have no future in their country of origin.
Furthermore, by leaving their country, they leave at the same timeliness poverty and misfortune. Indeed, this country is the country of all their misfortunes.
Besides, to leave their country to facilitate their mourning.
To conclude, we can say that the country of their birth becomes suddenly the country of their death.

   Nevertheless, it is their country of all their previous history.The source of their culture; of their roots.By leaving it, they will lose their culture.By losing their culture of origin; they will also lose their identity.This will provoke an identity crisis.
Moreover, even  if their relatives died.Their country of origin is their country of origin.The place where there are souvenirs of their parents.

13

Expression écrite d'anglais

Je crois que maintenant c'est le travail de ton professeur à faire la correction.
Bonne continuation.

14

Expression écrite d'anglais

Je vous remercie.

Mais juste une dernière petite question:
Au niveau grammaire et orthographe ça va?

15

Expression écrite d'anglais

Hello!
j'ai deja corrigé pas mal de mes fautes; mais il m'en reste;pourriez-vous m'aider à les toruver et à les corriger?

thks

Bonjour;
pourriez-vous m'aider à trouver et à corriger mes fautes...?

Merci d'avance.



1/Taylor is a woman who adopted TURTLE ;a cherokee child.
Annawake is an attorney
She works in an office that does a lot of work for the Cherokee Nation.
TURTLE is a Cherokee
She was adopted by TAYLOR.
2/The scene takes place

3/The nderlined word “I” refers to…

*We have dumped to Taylor a Cherokee child who names TURTLE.
But some years later, a lawyer named Annawake who does a lot of work for the Cherokee Nation; come to inform Taylor that with the eyes of the law.
She is guilty of having “stolen” this child, because the tribe did not give its approval.
Furthermore, the papers of adoptions are not good.
Discussion between these two women about Turtle.
Annawake  explains the law to Taylor.

4/ Annawake manages to win Taylor’s confidence by taking time to explain to her the laws nicely; and by taking time to explain her who she was.
5/ Tle lines which account for Annawake’s actual presence are:…….
•    The effects do they have on Taylor are:
•    Taylor is irritated; she is afraid that we take her her child.
•    She is fed up
•    She is afraid thus she pays attention on what she says
7/ The arguments catch character uses to defend their points of view are:…….

12/Annawake has professional arguments. Whereas taylor has personal arguments.
Annawake is fir Cherokee.
She defends their rights.
Indeed, she does a lot of work for the Cherokee nation.
While taylor blames the tribe.
Indeed, taylor blames the tribe for having mistreated TRUTLE; and to have abandoned her.

14/At the first, taylor is on the defensive because she is afraid that we take her tortule.
But after her does not pay any more attention on the lawyer
Annawake she thinks of being in her good right
She is determined to go up that she is right
And to finish, she is confident because she knows that it exists for her a constitution too; and that there is only Cherokee who can be denfend.

16

Expression écrite d'anglais

naïana a écrit :

1/Taylor is a woman who adopted TURTLE ;a cherokee child.
Annawake is an attorney
She works in an office that does a lot of work for the Cherokee Nation.
TURTLE is a CherokeeShe was adopted by TAYLOR.
2/The scene takes place

3/The nderlined word “I” refers to…

*We have dumped to Taylor a Cherokee child who names TURTLE.
But some years later, a lawyer named Annawake who does a lot of work for the Cherokee Nation; come to inform Taylor that with the eyes of the law .She is guilty of having “stolen” this child, because the tribe did not give its approval.
Furthermore, the papers of adoptions are not good.
Discussion between these two women about Turtle.
Annawake  explains the law to Taylor.

4/ Annawake manages to win Taylor’s confidence by taking time to explain to her the laws nicely; and by taking time to explain  __________  her who she was.
5/ Tle lines which account for Annawake’s actual presence are:…….
•    The effects do they have on Taylor are:
•    Taylor is irritated; she is afraid that we take her her child.
•    She is fed up
•    She is afraid thus she pays attention on what she says
7/ The arguments catch character uses to defend their points of view are:…….

12/Annawake has professional arguments. Whereas taylor has personal arguments.
Annawake is fir Cherokee.
She defends their rights.
Indeed, she does a lot of work for the Cherokee nation.
While taylor blames the tribe.
Indeed, taylor blames the tribe for having mistreated TRUTLE; and to have abandoned her.

14/At the first, taylor is on the defensive because she is afraid that we take her tortule.
But after her does not pay any more attention on the lawyer
Annawake she thinks of being in her good right
She is determined to go up that she is right
And to finish, she is confident because she knows that it exists for her a constitution too; and that there is only Cherokee who can be denfend.

17

Expression écrite d'anglais

En faite, ce n'est pas une expression ce que j'ai fait la; mais des phrases qui répondent à une compréhension.

Comme ceci est ce mieux?

Je ne comprend pas pourquoi vous m'avez souligné certains passages?!!

ps: Turtle est le prénom d'une petite fille qui à été adopté par TAYLOR.

1/Taylor is a woman who adopted TURTLE ;a cherokee child.
Annawake is an attorney
She works in an office that does a lot of work for the Cherokee Nation.
TURTLE is a Cherokee.
She was adopted by TAYLOR.
2/The scene takes place

3/The underlined word “I” refers to…

*they have dumped to Taylor a Cherokee child who names TURTLE.
But some years later, a lawyer named Annawake who does a lot of work for the Cherokee Nation; come to inform Taylor that with the eyes of the law .She is guilty of having “stolen” this child, because the tribe did not give its approval.
Furthermore, the papers of adoptions are not approval.
Discussion between these two women about Turtle.
Annawake  explains the law to Taylor.

4/ Annawake manages to win Taylor’s confidence by taking time to explain to her the laws nicely; and by taking time to explain  __________  her who she was.
5/ Tle lines which account for Annawake’s actual presence are:…….
•    The effects that they have on Taylor are:
•    Taylor is irritated; she is afraid that we take her child.
•    She is fed up
•    She is afraid thus she pays attention in what she says
7/ The arguments catch character uses to defend their points of view are:…….

12/Annawake has professional arguments. Whereas taylor has personal arguments.
Annawake is for Cherokee.
She defends their rights.
Indeed, she does a lot of work for the Cherokee nation.
While taylor blames the tribe.
Indeed, taylor blames the tribe for having mistreated TRUTLE; and to have abandoned her.

14/At the first, taylor is on the defensive because she is afraid that we take her tortule.
But after she does not pay any more attention on the lawyer
Annawake she thinks of being in her good law
She is determined to go up that she is right
And to finish, she is confident because she knows that it exists for her a constitution too; and that there is only Cherokee who can be denfend.

18

Expression écrite d'anglais

J'ai souligné ce que tu as écrit deux fois.
Je ne pense pas que tu as eu le temps d'essayer de corriger tout ce que j'ai mis en gras!

19

Expression écrite d'anglais

Voila j'ai tout corrigé

1/Taylor is a woman who adopted TURTLE; a cherokee child.
Annawake is an attorney
She works in an office that does a lot of work for the Cherokee Nation.
TURTLE is a Cherokee
She was adopted by TAYLOR.
2/The scene takes place

3/The underlined word “I” refers to…

*We had  dumped her a Cherokee child; TURTLE.
But some years later, a lawyer named Annawake who does a lot of work for the Cherokee Nation; come to inform Taylor that with the eyes of the law .She is guilty of having “stolen” this child, because the tribe did not give its approval.
Furthermore, the adoption papers are not valid.
Discussion between these two women about Turtle.
Annawake  explains the law to Taylor.

4/ Annawake manages to win Taylor’s confidence by taking time to explain to her the laws  Politely  ; and by taking time to explain  __________  her who she was.
5/ The lines which account for Annawake’s actual presence are:…….
•    The effects that there was on Taylor are:
•    Taylor is irritated; she is afraid that we take her child.
•    She is fed up
•    She is afraid thus she pays attention on what she says
7/ The arguments each character uses to defend their points of view are:…….

12/Annawake has professional arguments. Whereas Taylor has personal arguments.
Annawake is for Cherokee.
She defends their rights.
Indeed, she does a lot of work for the Cherokee nation.
While Taylor blames the tribe.
Indeed, Taylor blames the tribe for having mistreated TURTLE; and to have abandoned her.

14/At the first, taylor is on the defensive because she is afraid that we take her Turtle.
But after she does not pay any more attention on the lawyer
Annawake she thinks of being in her She respects
she is determined to show that she is right
And to finish, she is confident because she knows that there is also a constitution for her; and that there is only Cherokee who can be defend.

20

Expression écrite d'anglais

naïanada a écrit :

1/Taylor is a woman who adopted TURTLE; a cherokee child.
Annawake is an attorney
She works in an office that does a lot of work for the Cherokee Nation.
TURTLE is a Cherokee
She was adopted by TAYLOR.
2/The scene takes place

3/The underlined word “I” refers to…

*We had  dumped her a Cherokee child ; TURTLE.
But some years later, a lawyer named Annawake ____ who does a lot of work for the Cherokee Nation ; come to inform Taylor that with the eyes of the law .She is guilty of having “stolen” this child, because the tribe did not give its approval.
Furthermore, the adoption papers are not valid.
*Discussion between these two women about Turtle.
Annawake  explains the law to Taylor.

4/ Annawake manages to win Taylor’s confidence by taking time to explain to her the laws  Politely  ; and by taking time to explain  __________  her who she was.
5/ The lines which account for Annawake’s actual presence are:…….
•    The effects that there was on Taylor are:
•    Taylor is irritated; she is afraid that we take her child.
•    She is fed up
•    She is afraid___ thus she pays attention on what she says
7/ The arguments each character uses to defend their points of view are:…….

12/Annawake has professional arguments . Whereas Taylor has personal arguments.
Annawake is for Cherokee.
She defends their rights.
Indeed, she does a lot of work for the Cherokee nation.
*While Taylor blames the tribe.
Indeed, Taylor blames the tribe for having mistreated TURTLE; and to have abandoned her.

14/At the first, taylor is on the defensive because she is afraid that we ___take her Turtle.
But after she does not pay any more attention on the lawyer
Annawake she thinks of being in her She respects
she is determined to show that she is right
And to finish, she is confident because she knows that there is also a constitution for her; and that there is only Cherokee who can be defend.

* Ceci n'est pas une phrase, syntactiquement parlant.

Je ne reviendrai pas dessus si je trouve encore que tu n'as pas tout corrigé!